A Day in My Life as a Mystery Writer
A Day in My Life as a Mystery Writer
You might think that a day in the life of a mystery writer is spent elegantly tapping away at an antique typewriter in a cozy study, sipping artisanal coffee while conjuring brilliant plots out of thin air. You would be wrong. Very wrong.
Here’s what it’s really like:
6:30 AM – The Summoning (of my Favorite Flavored Coffee)
The day begins not with a graceful awakening but with a groggy stumble into the kitchen, where I perform an ancient ritual: the Sacred Brewing of the Coffee. Without this ceremony, words don’t happen. Ideas don’t happen. Frankly, coherent blinking doesn’t happen.
While the coffee machine sputters to life (with sounds suspiciously similar to a dying walrus), I stare blankly at my planner and pretend today will be the day I finally stick to the schedule.
Spoiler: It won’t.
7:00 AM – The Great Brainstorm (a.k.a. Shower Mysteries)
Some of my best plot twists arrive while shampoo is sliding into my eyes. There’s something about the combination of hot water and mild soap-induced blindness that really unlocks the creative process.
Today’s brilliant idea: "What if the missing heirloom wasn’t stolen... but hidden by the talking cat?"
Note to self: work this into a future book.
8:00 AM – Writing Sprint (and Minor Life Crisis)
Armed with coffee and a wildly ambitious to-do list, I sit at my desk (which is 70% functional workspace, 30% planner) and open the document.
Five minutes later:
Check email.
Check Instagram.
Check if penguins have knees (they do, by the way).
Remember I’m supposed to be writing.
Finally, I force myself to type. The first sentence? A masterpiece of profound storytelling:
“She walked into the room.”
I spend the next ten minutes trying to find a synonym for "walked" because clearly, this is the most important task in the universe right now.
(She sauntered into the room? Shuffled? Glided? Moonwalked?). Eventually, I settle on “stepped” and reward myself with a snack.
10:30 AM – Detective Work (a.k.a. Research Rabbit Holes)
Research is a vital part of mystery writing. Unfortunately, my research methods resemble a feral raccoon in a library.
Today’s plan: look up 18th-century lock mechanisms for a plot point.
What actually happens:
Learn how to pick a lock (in theory, FBI, in theory).
Watch a 45-minute documentary about secret doors in castles.
Add three unnecessary but fascinating subplots to my outline.
I emerge hours later knowing more about medieval booby traps than any normal human should.
Zero regrets.
12:00 PM – Lunch (And Conversations With Fictional People)
While making lunch (translation: using the Ninja to heat the leftovers that survived the week), I carry on deep, passionate arguments in my head between my protagonist and the prime suspect.
Out loud.
While wielding a fork like a gavel.
To any neighbors glancing through the window, it looks like I’m having a full courtroom drama starring only myself and a suspiciously aggressive salad.
Just another day in the life of a writer.
1:00 PM – The Plot Thickens (and So Does the Snack Supply)
Back to the writing cave. Now the characters are behaving badly as they are refusing to follow the outline, flirting when they should be investigating, and developing shocking emotional arcs that were absolutely not in the plan. It’s chaos. It’s beautiful. It’s slightly terrifying.
I bribe them with snacks (read: I bribe myself with snacks) and keep going.
3:00 PM – The Crisis of Confidence Hour
Every day around this time, a familiar thought creeps in: "This is the worst story ever written by human hands."
Cue dramatic sighing. Cue staring dramatically out the window like a Victorian widow awaiting news from the front. Cue texts to fellow writer friends that simply say "WHYYYY" or "I have forgotten how to words."
Their responses, without fail: "Same."
Solidarity is a beautiful thing.
4:00 PM – The Great Rebound
Mysteriously (pun intended), the story usually starts to click again just when I’m about to give up and start a new life as a professional penguin researcher.
I solve a plot hole. I write a killer (ha!) line of dialogue. I remember why I love this job: because there’s nothing more magical than building a puzzle only you know the answer to until the reader solves it right along with you.
5:30 PM – Evening Wind-Down (Sort Of)
Technically, this is when I “stop working.” Realistically, I’m still jotting notes on napkins, texting myself plot ideas, and half-watching TV shows while silently judging their crime-solving techniques.
(“You touched the body without gloves? Rookie move.”)
8:00 PM – Reading for Pleasure (and "Research")
I curl up with a good book; sometimes another cozy mystery, sometimes true crime, sometimes something completely unrelated and lose myself in someone else’s story. I tell myself it’s “research.” It’s totally research.
(And maybe just a little bit an excuse to buy more books. Shhh.)
10:00 PM – Brainstorming While Falling Asleep
As I drift off, the day’s final creative bursts flicker through my mind: a clue I could plant earlier, a red herring I could sharpen, a twist that might just knock readers off their chairs. By the time I actually fall asleep, I’m excited to do it all over again tomorrow even the coffee rituals, the self-doubt, and the 45-minute research rabbit holes.
Because honestly? I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Not even for a castle with secret doors.
(Although… if anyone does have a castle with secret doors, call me.)
Final Thoughts
Being a mystery writer is part dream job, part delightful chaos, and part snack-fueled improv show. It’s messy, it’s hilarious, and it’s exactly where I’m meant to be.
If you’re curious about my latest mysteries, writing adventures, or just want to swap lock-picking tips (in theory, FBI, in theory), stick around!
And tell me: If you could write a mystery, what would the title be?
I’d love to hear it in the comments!
